3 Steps For The New Scam Victim2023-11-23T13:31:37-05:00

Are You A New Scam Victim? Please Read This

You Have Been Scammed, You Are A New Scam Victim – Now What?

This Is A Very Confusing Time For You

Your scam has just ended and you will be in shock, confusion, fear, and anger. You will be unsure about what to do now. Most New Scam Victims are just like you!

SCARS 3 Steps For New Victims

The SCARS 3 STEPS™ For New Scam Victims

STEP 1: Stop All Communications!

As a New Scam Victim you must block all contact with your scammers, and do not accept friend requests or message requests or contact from people you do not know personally. Mark any email from the scammers or strangers as spam. Try not to look at anything from the scam, save it in a folder, and do not look at it again except to be able to report it to your local police or on www.Anyscam.com

STEP 2: Accept That You Were Scammed

This means that you have to accept that you are the victim of a crime. Scams are crimes even if you did not send money. It is all about the deception, it was all lies. Nothing that you were told is the truth, so none of the stories or promises matter anymore because they were all lies. This is hard to accept for new scam victims, but it is what you have to do to be able to move forward.

As part of this STEP, you will need to report it to the police – this is your confirmation to yourself that you accept that you were scammed, that it was all a lie. You start with your local police – this is not easy, you will feel embarrassed and shame, but you do not need to. The police are not always going to be sensitive to scam victims, and they may not be able to do anything to get your money back or stop that scammer, but reporting matters regardless. Tell them you just need to report it and get a report number – this is your proof to yourself that you accept that this happened, and you may need it if reporting it to your national police or the FBI later.

Once this is done, put it all away and don’t look at it again if possible.

STEP 3: New Scam Victim – Focus Only On Yourself

Do not try to track down or contact the real person who is in the photos, because you do not have a relationship with them and they are a victim too. Your relationship was just with the scammers – notice we said scammers – because scammers work in teams, there are almost never single scammers anymore. Try to separate the past from your future – hard as that will be.

Now you need to focus on your own emotional health and stability. Scams can be very traumatizing and they can lead to serious mental illness unless you take care of yourself. The scam happened, but now it is time to turn your back on that and focus on yourself and how you are going to move forward and recover.

We recommend that all New Scam Victims take two immediate actions to help yourself:

  1. Join one of our support groups or forums: sign up at support.AgainstScams.org
  2. If you feel you need someone locally to talk to we recommend that you seek a local trauma counselor. If you are looking for local trauma counselors please use the following resources:


As a New Scam Victim, you do not need to tell your family or friends at this point unless you need to – that can wait until you are feeling stronger.

The process of recovery will take some time – it depends on how long you were in the scam and the depth of the trauma you are experiencing. Do not try to rush it and do not assume you will get over it instantly. Most scam victims will need months and sometimes longer to return to emotional stability. How seriously you take your recovery will determine how successful you will be – there are no shortcuts. It is hard and it takes work.

A Word About Fear

Many scam victims are in fear after the scam ends. You might be afraid of the scammer’s threats or something else. Scammers are business people and they only do what gets them money, they will not waste time on anything else. So you do not need to be afraid – remember that scammers ONLY tell lies. But if you really feel fearful tell your local police about this too.

If You Need To Talk To Someone Right Now

If you feel that you must talk to someone right now call this number (in the U.S. & Canada): 1-800-273-8255 – it is available 24 hours in English and Spanish. To find other crisis hotlines for your country search on Google for “Crisis Hotline.” Remember, there is no shame in asking for help.

Lock Yourself Down

After the scam, you will need to make sure that you lock down your social media profiles to ensure that scammers cannot see your life anymore! Go through your privacy setting and change anything public to private.

Also, if you shared any financial or banking information with your scammers you will need to protect those accounts. Contact your bank and notify them you have been scammed and change your account numbers and access information – do this for anything that you think might be at risk.

To Learn More

At this point, you have to focus on learning to better understand what happened to you. You are a victim, but that does not mean you are an expert in scams. Learning is an essential part of controlling your fear, anger, and confusion. It is part of your recovery process.

We recommend that you begin learning at our SCARS Official Website: www.RomanceScamsNOW.com

You will find thousands of articles about scams and scammers to help you better understand how all of this works. Start with the Psychology of Scams section to understand how this works for you.




The 3 Steps™ are a part of the SCARS Steps™ Self-Help Recovery Program available on www.RomanceScamsNOW.com

SCARS FREE Scam Victim Support & Recovery ProgramsDo You Need Support? Get It Now!

SCARS provides the leading Support & Recovery program for relationship scam victims – completely FREE!

Our managed peer support groups allow victims to talk to other survivors and recover in the most experienced environment possible, for as long as they need. Recovery takes as long as it takes – we put no limits on our support!

SCARS is the most trusted support & education provider in the world. Our team is certified in trauma-informed care, grief counseling, and so much more!

To apply to join our groups visit support.AgainstScams.org

We also offer separate support groups for family & friends too.

SCARS STAR MembershipBecome a SCARS STAR™ Member

SCARS offers memberships in our STAR program, which includes many benefits for a very low annual membership fee!

SCARS STAR Membership benefits include:

  • FREE Counseling or Therapy Benefit from our partner BetterHelp.com
  • Exclusive members-only content & publications
  • Discounts on SCARS Self-Help Books Save
  • And more!

To learn more about the SCARS STAR Membership visit membership.AgainstScams.org

To become a SCARS STAR Member right now visit join.AgainstScams.org


The Latest SCARS Posts:

FAQ: How Do You Properly Report Scammers?

If you lost money: the way to report this is FIRST with your LOCAL POLICE – they are your first responders, and will be the ones to recover your money if at all possible!

Then report to:

  1. U.S. Secret Service – the Secret Service wants to talk to you Find the nearest U.S. Secret Service Field Office to you  https://www.secretservice.gov/contact/field-offices
    • Crypto Scams can also be reported by email to: CryptoFraud@SecretService.gov
    • Victims who require further assistance may call 1-888-813-USSS
    • Deaf and hard of hearing 202-406-5370
  2. U.S. Federal Trade Commission at https://reportfraud.ftc.gov/#/?orgcode=SCARS – the FTC will send a copy of your report to the FBI, so you don’t have to bother.
  3. SCARS on www.Anyscam.com – for worldwide distribution.
  • SCARS no longer recommends reporting to the FBI

You can find more places to report here: https://romancescamsnow.com/reporting-entity-directory/


SCARS IS A DIGITAL PUBLISHER AND DOES NOT OFFER HEALTH OR MEDICAL ADVICE, LEGAL ADVICE, FINANCIAL ADVICE, OR SERVICES THAT SCARS IS NOT LICENSED OR REGISTERED TO PERFORM. IF YOU’RE FACING A MEDICAL EMERGENCY, CALL YOUR LOCAL EMERGENCY SERVICES IMMEDIATELY, OR VISIT THE NEAREST EMERGENCY ROOM OR URGENT CARE CENTER. YOU SHOULD CONSULT YOUR HEALTHCARE PROVIDER BEFORE FOLLOWING ANY MEDICALLY RELATED INFORMATION PRESENTED ON OUR PAGES. ALWAYS CONSULT A LICENSED ATTORNEY FOR ANY ADVICE REGARDING LEGAL MATTERS. A LICENSED FINANCIAL OR TAX PROFESSIONAL SHOULD BE CONSULTED BEFORE ACTING ON ANY INFORMATION RELATING TO YOUR PERSONAL FINANCES OR TAX RELATED ISSUES AND INFORMATION. This content and other material contained on the website, apps, newsletter, and products (“Content”), is general in nature and for informational purposes only and does not constitute medical, legal, or financial advice; the Content is not intended to be a substitute for licensed or regulated professional advice. Always consult your doctor or other qualified healthcare provider, lawyer, financial, or tax professional with any questions you may have regarding the educational information contained herein. SCARS makes no guarantees about the efficacy of information described on or in SCARS’ Content. The information contained is subject to change and is not intended to cover all possible situations or effects. SCARS does not recommend or endorse any specific professional or care provider, product, service, or other information that may be mentioned in SCARS’ websites, apps, and Content unless explicitly identified as such. The disclaimers herein are provided on this page for ease of reference. These disclaimers supplement and are a part of SCARS’ website’s Terms of Use

Legal Notices: 

All original content is Copyright © 1991 – 2021 Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Inc. (D.B.A SCARS) All Rights Reserved Worldwide & Webwide. Third-party copyrights acknowledge. SCARS, SCARS|INTERNATIONAL, SCARS, SCARS|SUPPORT, SCARS, RSN, Romance Scams Now, SCARS|INTERNATION, SCARS|WORLDWIDE, SCARS|GLOBAL, SCARS, Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams, Society of Citizens Against Romance Scams, SCARS|ANYSCAM, Project Anyscam, Anyscam, SCARS|GOFCH, GOFCH, SCARS|CHINA, SCARS|CDN, SCARS|UK, SCARS|LATINOAMERICA, SCARS|MEMBER, SCARS|VOLUNTEER, SCARS Cybercriminal Data Network, Cobalt Alert, Scam Victims Support Group, SCARS ANGELS, SCARS RANGERS, SCARS MARSHALLS, SCARS PARTNERS, are all trademarks of Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Inc., All Rights Reserved Worldwide Contact the law firm for the Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Incorporated by email at legal@AgainstScams.org